By Neha Kirpal
All us Indians love controversy – whether it’s in the form of watching voyeuristic videos on reality shows, leaked personal photos of our favourite celebrities, or endless bulletins of gossip-induced tabloid journalism splashed on our 24-hour news channels. At the end of the day, it seems almost satisfying listening to the juicy details of someone else’s story … ‘Scandal Point’ is a satire of Bollywood based on this obsession. It speaks of our pitiless generation’s insatiable hunger for information about public figures and their private lives, as well as our shockingly short attention spans for the same.
Glitterati, sex, drugs, breaking news… It has all the ingredients of a perfect potboiler! After all, it’s not altogether untrue when they say that fame comes at a price.
LBBD’s Neha Kirpal discussed scandals, fame, and other such notions with Fahad Samar, the author of this recently released book that’s quite literally ‘making the headlines.’ Here’s his take on some of the biggest scandals Delhi’s seen.
Fahad Samar | As a writer and columnist, I usually employ wit and levity to comment on the world around us. However, it’s difficult to maintain a sense of humour about the shenanigans of some of our countrymen when they possess neither a conscience nor an iota of shame.
A cursory glance at the four scandals listed below reveals that they straddle the realm of politics, the judiciary, sports, and religion.
It is quite apparent that ‘scandal’ is not restricted merely to Bollywood and the beau monde, but flourishes in various spheres and strata of our society. We, as a nation, seem to exult in being equal opportunity offenders and scandalmongers.
So, I have concluded that rather than decry scandal and corruption, we should instead celebrate them.
That’s the only way we can hold on to any semblance of sanity.
The DLF-Robert Vadra scandal |
Mama Mia! When will we understand that Priyanka Gandhi is not just Amethi ki beti, she is the deified Daughter of India. Her husband Robert, that mustachioed, muscle bound mushtanda, is therefore the de facto daamaad of the nation. Even though the inglorious tradition of giving dowry is banned, we Indians shower our jamai babus with rich gifts in gratitude for taking our daughters off our hands for good. It is only right that young Robert be given whatever his little heart desires. And let’s be grateful that he seeks only vast tracts of land at throwaway prices. Imagine if Robert baba had political aspirations? Then he would surely become our Minister for External Affairs.
Abhishek Manusinghvi sex tape scandal |
This scandal blew me away. I am so proud that we Indians have finally matched up to our American counterparts. If Bill Clinton could receive oral sex in the Oval orifice…err…office then our desi politicians have also risen admirably to the occasion. My heart gladdens to know that within private chambers in public places, our upstanding netas are getting down and dirty. Shame on that dastardly driver who filmed the amorous lawyer in his lair and and circulated his tumescent employer’s tape. The furtive servant waited while his poor Master baited. But after a brief hiatus, our notorious netaji is now back in action on TV, all holier than thou. I guess in the land of the kama sutra nothing suckceeds like suckcess!
Kalmadi’s CWG scam |
‘Citius, Altius, Fortius!’ Seemingly inspired by the Olympic motto, the venerable Kalmadi decided to go for gold and pulled off a scam that was faster, higher, stronger than any other scandal in the history of Indian sport. The Commonwealth Games instead became a game of amassing personal wealth. And there was nothing commonplace about how his cronies and he went about milking the nation dry. They effortlessly jumped every legal hurdle and pole-vaulted above fiscal propriety. Unfortunately, like some great sportsmen, Kalmadi was forced to retire prematurely. Lodged in Tihar jail, he contemplated producing a movie on his mercurial life and crimes: Bhaag Milker Bhaag.
Asaram Bapu rape scandal |
I first heard of the infamous Asaram when he proclaimed that Nirbhaya would never have been raped had she fallen at the feet of her rapists and called them her brothers. I was enthralled by the intellect and compassion of this gyaani guru and decided to follow his every utterance. He did not disappoint and had me amazed with his nimble dancing skills at public rallies, and ability to talk crap as if they were pearls of wisdom. After dodging the law by using all his powerful connections, the ungodly man was finally arrested. Subjected to a medical test, he performed a miracle by proving that a revered guru can also be a dirty old man. Asaram is undoubtedly omnipresent and omnipotent.